What is brotherhood? Men are not meant to be isolated, Modern society either sells men on the supposed benefits to living an isolated and disconnected life, or it creates situations that require it in order to succeed or as is the case for most people, just to get by. This goes against how man has developed and lived since the beginning of time. Men need to be part of a tribe, men need brotherhood, we are not meant to be lone wolves. Part of why society is where it is today is because men stopped depending on each other and started depending on the Empire.
A lone man is quite easy to manage in one way or another and is rarely a threat to something as widespread as the Empire. Without a support network a man alone is nothing but the sum of his intelligence, genetics, and life experience. His wants or needs are his alone and are of little consequence to anyone else especially the Empire. This makes him easy to control and dependent on the Empire and its many systems. This is the Empire’s future, a large pool of interchangeable units of labor.
When a man finds himself in a group of men he quickly figures out how he stacks up. When this group is your brothers, that have your best interests at heart they will push you to better yourself, and help you along the way while you do the same for them. When you are alone and the men around you are strangers, they likely don’t have your best interest at heart and even if they do you can simply ignore them and live in a fantasy that you are already the best, and you will stay exactly where you are, never growing or bettering yourself. Being part of a group that you care about and care what they think makes that impossible. While a woman might say that you did your best, a brother will look you in the eyes and say you could have done better and then shows you how and If nothing else the healthy competition brotherhood provides will be the catalyst for growth.
Brotherhood used to be a part of everyday life back in the times of roaming tribes trying to survive. Other tribes were trying to kill them, nature was trying to kill them, all of life was a fight. The men of these tribes would draw a perimeter around themselves and the tribe and fight to protect it. Defending this perimeter has always been job one. Then as tribes began to settle down and become villages, and villages became towns and towns cities, the world became more “civilized.” With that “civilization” Less and less people had to fight to survive. Male only professions then became the holdout for the last vestiges of brotherhood until the only place where men had to band together to fight for a common goal, and watch each others back was the Military, law enforcement, and the Fire service. However thanks to the degradation of these bonds and traditions of these institutions, corruption, over regulation, back stabbing colleges and toxic command staff to name a few, brotherhood in these professions as well has began to die or already has. These so called, last remaining holdouts of brotherhood are also said to have a higher purpose and are more of a calling then a job, but as many who get into them know this has become less and less true as time goes on and are now just marketing and recruiting campaigns designed to pull on those strings inside men in order to replenish the ranks.
I don’t believe I’ve ever experienced true brotherhood, looking back I was exposed to fleeting moments of something that resembled it but nothing that ever truly rose to the standard. It took me reading some books that shined a light on it and brought brotherhood and tribe into perspective, to know I was even missing it. I knew something was missing, and I knew that I was looking for it, but what it was specifically eluded me. Looking back on the goals I’ve had in life, brotherhood was major aspect in all of them and I just didn’t realize it or have the language to explain it at the time.
Now that I knew what I was searching for, and after sometime of actively searching for it, I question if it is still attainable in today’s society. It seemed hard to attain before 2019 let alone now, after 3 years of society dividing propaganda, the damage resulting from the pandemic response, political turmoil and the destruction of societies social bonds thanks to social media over the last decade it almost seems impossible. This damage has resulted in what some would call “families” actively splitting up or exiling their own over political views, vaccination status, or any number of meaningless issues of the day that have been pushed on them by society and the Empire.
A man without a brotherhood who is going through hardship can overburden his wife with the weight of his problems. This will cause more stress on the relationship and family, often times much more than necessary. However even when you have no hardships, having some brotherhood in your life fulfills an evolutionary requirement for men. When this requirement is fulfilled they feel better physically as well, their mood, mental health and confidence all improve. While this is great for the men, this will also transfer over into other aspects of your life and make your family as a whole happier as well.
Some will say that your wife or girlfriend should be all the support network you need, but she doesn’t want to be your therapist, or your only problem solver, she wants to be your wife. And despite what they say, women cannot truly understand some things that men go through for one simple reason, they are not men, and because of that they will see the world in a different way.
“Your woman will never be able to fully relax into her femininity so long as you treat her like your coach, therapist or healer. She can support you, but how are you supporting yourself?”
~Brandan Schmidt
WHAT IS BROTHERHOOD
Summed up in a few words, from an online meme, “Friends help you move, brothers help you move bodies.” Brotherhood is more than just having a male friend, or even a few of them. It is about having men in your life that care about each other and are willing to have each others back. Who you are willing to put before your self if the need arises. Much of what I understand brotherhood to be now occurred to me after reading The Way of Men by Jack Donovan as well as some of the fleeting moments of pesudo-brotherhood I experienced from my time in the Fire Service.
Being part of a brotherhood is a commitment and in some ways a skill. It requires that you show up, and put in work with or to help the men in your group. It requires this consistently to maintain that relationship, like a skill it is something that you will get better at as time goes on and it will improve other aspects of your life. Showing up and putting in work is what is required to run any business, organization or your family, Brotherhood nurtures this in men making them more prepared for the real world.
Brotherhood also requires honor, but how do you know what is honorable? How do you know if you or your brothers are honorable? Cultures change, society changes, what is acceptable, changes and are subjective to the individual or group of individuals, this is where the honor code comes in and in short, you and your brothers will have to figure out what honor means to you, what your code is and what constitutes fallowing it? This code should be one part of the set of rules that govern your brotherhood, following them is honorable, the more you follow the more honorable you are and if you break them you dishonor the group And there needs to be consequences. This is partially how the group is held accountable. This through history has been tied to chivalry, and manners, loyalty etc. For instance The marines motto is “Semper fidelis, or Semper Fi. This means always faithful, practically this translates to never let a fellow marine fight alone or having each others back. This one aspect alone when instilled properly, is why the few veterans I hear talking about still having that brotherhood even once they are off active duty, are those coming out of the Marine Corps.
Brotherhood begins as an alliance between men against all external forces. This oath be it formal or informal spoken or unspoken is the most sacred aspect of the brotherhood. The oath of brotherhood creates a voluntary kinship a sense of collective identity a foundation of trust. The oath of brotherhood is what holds everything together and without it or when it has been irreparable corrupted by conniving and betrayal the brotherhood will inevitably fall apart.
~ Jack Donovan
Brotherhood requires commitment, you will need to know that the men beside you are going to have your back and are not going to turn and run, they also need to know the same about you. You will need to be able to count on them in times of crisis. In order to be successful you will want the other men to prove they are committed to the team. This is one aspect that is looked for in special operations selections. Also beyond proving ability this is why police and fire departments have probationary periods, also the reason motorcycle gangs have prospects, and street gangs have jumping ins. All these groups have tests to judge how committed the individual is to the team.
The men that want to join have to also care about what the members think, if they don’t care what they think there is no reason for them to work to grow and improve. Men who don’t care about what the other men think of them aren’t dependable.
Brothers should push each other and hold each other to a standard. Men need someone to push them, and call them on their bullshit when the going gets tough in order to become what they are truly capable of. Where a woman might pat you tell you you did your best, your brother should look you in the eyes and say “do better.”
As an attempt in recent years to get back some shred brotherhood men’s groups, masterminds, and men’s support groups started popping up and becoming more popular. While being well intentioned, they are usually built around nothing more than getting together and talking with no other goal, purpose, or activity. This alone cannot foster brotherhood, there needs to be an over arching common goal, some kind of battle to fight. They need to go to war in some way whether that is against them selves (Self improvement with a stated goal), another team (sports league) or in the business world.
“Men need accountability, challenge and to be confronted by the truth. These things are not found easily in modern life, but they are found in brotherhood.”
~Brandan Schmidt
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